|A Little Romance|
|Season 2, episode 11|
|Air date||January 13, 1989|
|Writer(s)||Rob Dames & Bob Fraser|
|Previous||Middle Age Crazy|
While the guys flutter hearts at a charity bachelor auction, D.J. experiences her first broken heart.
However, Michael soon informs D.J. that he plans to sit with Kathy Santoni at lunch the next day; when D.J. asks why, Michael explains that although he knows D.J. is nice, fun and smart, he views Kathy as “so pretty”. When Stephanie tries asking her about it, D.J. tells her she wants to be alone. So she gathers up Stephanie's belongings and throws her out, even going so far as to throw out Mr. Bear with her.
Meanwhile, Rebecca and Danny are hosting a charity event where eligible bachelors are auctioned off to women who want a date with them. Among the participating bachelors are Danny (who gets a date with an elderly lady wearing a hat with a bird on it) and Joey (who gets a date with Heather, the elderly lady’s granddaughter). However, it is Jesse who ends up receiving the highest bid of them all… from a jealous Rebecca, who wins with a bid of $1,700.
Once they’re back at home, Jesse, Danny and Joey hear about D.J.’s broken heart. However, they mess things up a little when Danny tries to tell D.J. the story of the Ugly Duckling. D.J. interprets this to mean that she herself is ugly, so she leaves the bedroom and goes into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. Luckily, Becky soon arrives. After she tells off the guys about the Ugly Duckling story (which she says should only be told about some other kid) and Jesse shoots down Joey's suggestion of "Hansel and Gretel", Danny asks her to try talking to D.J. about what had happened, since D.J., being a girl, needs a woman to talk to (in Danny’s words), especially when it comes to subjects like a broken heart.
As Stephanie and Mr. Bear emerge from Michelle's room to go back into her original room, Becky ushers D.J. out of the bathroom and back into the bedroom, closing the door behind them and locking it. Stephanie goes back to get the rest of her stuff, realizing she didn't have it with her the first go-round. However, when she tries to get back into her original room after knocking on the door, Mr. Bear is thrown out for the second time tonight, before the door closes again and is locked again so the chat can focus on Becky and D.J. alone. As the "end-of-episode" inspirational music plays, Becky explains she was in a similar situation as D.J.: Boyfriends come, and boyfriends go. They hug, and D.J. decides that maybe another time, they should talk about girl stuff.
As the music stops and they exit the room, Becky and D.J. discover Stephanie fast and sound asleep in her sleeping bag with Mr. Bear next to her right near the room's entrance. As Becky leaves and heads downstairs, D.J. drags the sleeping bag, with Stephanie and Mr. Bear in tow, into their room, and puts it right near the foot of the toy chest near Stephanie's bed.
The chat works, and when Danny finds out, he thanks Becky for her help.
- When Nick goes into Michelle's room to check on Michelle and Stephanie, he closes the door. But as he leaves, the door is open.
Kimmy: [runs into D.J.'s and Stephanie's room excitedly] Stop the homework!
D.J.: But if I stop, you won't have anything to copy.
[In D.J. and Stephanie's bedroom...]
Stephanie: Hi, D.J. How come your boyfriend left so soon?
D.J.: I don't have a boyfriend.
Stephanie: Did he dump you?
D.J.: We broke up. Just forget it. I want to be alone. [gathers up all of Stephanie's belongings] Here's your sleeping bag, your pajamas, and your pillow. Go sleep with Michelle.
Stephanie: [as she is pushed out the door by D.J.] But– But– But– But– But– But– [But...D.J. has completely pushed her out and slammed the door in her face.] Aren't you forgetting something? [D.J. reopens the door and throws Mr. Bear out before slamming the door again.] How rude.
[In D.J. and Stephanie's bedroom again, D.J. is sitting on her bed reading, as the guys come in.]
Danny: We heard what happened. Did you have a fight?
D.J.: No. It's all because I'm not pretty.
Jesse: Come on.
Danny: That's not true. I think you're very pretty.
D.J.: You have to think that. You're my dad.
Danny: [to D.J.] Honey, did I ever tell you the story of the Ugly Duckling?
Joey: Right, good story.
Jesse: Yeah, tell the Ugly Duckling story.
D.J.: Ugly? You guys think I'm ugly? I just thought I wasn't pretty. Now I'm ugly! [She gets up from the bed and heads out of the room; Danny, Jesse and Joey follow her.]
[In the hallway...]
Joey: D.J... [D.J. then heads into the bathroom and closes the door behind her; Danny, Jesse and Joey stop in front of the door.] We don't think you're ugly.
Jesse: Yeah. Right. It's the duck that's ugly.
Danny: [as Becky walks up the stairs behind them] And the duck turns into a beautiful swan.
Becky: I don't believe it. [The guys turn to her.] You guys told her the story of the Ugly Duckling?
Joey: Yeah. [Danny and Jesse nod]
Becky: You never tell that story unless it's about some other kid!
Danny: [to Becky] Would you try talking to her? Maybe D.J. needs a woman to talk to. [Becky nods]
Joey: We should've told her "Hansel and Gretel". [Danny nods as he and Joey turn to leave down the stairs]
Jesse: That's for kids in the woods, ding-dong. [Danny gives Jesse a look as Jesse heads after Danny and Joey.]
[As Stephanie emerges from Michelle's room, Becky knocks on the bathroom door.]
Stephanie: Oh, good, my room's open.
Becky: D.J.? It's just Becky. Do you wanna come out so we can talk?
Stephanie: [realizing something] Forgot my stuff. [She goes back to Michelle's room to get the rest of her belongings.]
Becky: [as the bathroom door opens and she ushers D.J. out of there] Come on, sweetheart. Let's go into your room.
[Just as soon as both are in the room and the door is closed, Stephanie re-emerges from Michelle's room with the rest of her belongings, apparently not knowing that Becky's locked the door so the chat can be focused on her and D.J. alone. Stephanie knocks on the door, which opens, and Mr. Bear is thrown out for the second time tonight, before the door closes again and is locked again.]
Stephanie: [picking up Mr. Bear] Sorry, Mr. Bear. You've had a rough night.
[We then cut to D.J. and Stephanie's room, where D.J. and Becky are alone as mentioned.]
D.J.: Becky, there's nothing to talk about. I'm ugly, boys don't like me and that's it.
Becky: D.J., that's not true. You happen to be a very pretty girl. But I know how you feel. When I was in the 7th grade, I had the biggest crush on Sven Anderson. But he liked blondes, so I got a big bottle of peroxide.
D.J.: Did it work?
Becky: It turned my hair orange. I looked like Howdy Doody in a miniskirt.
D.J.: Howdy who?
Becky: Anyway, my mother said: 'Don't you worry about what a boyfriend or anybody else thinks of you. You just be the best Becky you can be.' Then she made me stand there and list all my good points.
D.J.: You're not gonna make me do that, are you?
Becky: Yes, I am. Now, go on, try it.
D.J.: Well, I'm pretty good at school. I have a lot of friends. I have a purple belt in karate. I'm nice to animals. I have great hair.
Becky: You see? You know what? Those are just a few of the wonderful things about you. Deej, that boy blew it. You are the best.
D.J.: Thanks, Becky.
Becky: You're welcome.
D.J.: Do you think I'll ever have another boyfriend?
Becky: Oh, you'll have lots of boyfriends. And some will break your heart and if I'm not mistaken, you'll probably break a few hearts yourself. It'll be great. And then someday when you least expect it, you'll meet that one special guy. And before you know it, you'll be paying $1,700 to go out on a date with him.
D.J.: I don't understand.
Becky: Neither do I. But you're feeling better?
D.J.: Yeah, I guess.
D.J.: Becky? Would it be all right if I called you sometime to talk about girl stuff?
Becky: Any time you want.
Becky: You're welcome.
[As they exit the room, they discover Stephanie sound asleep in her sleeping bag near the room's entrance.]
D.J.: You go on, I'll handle this.
[As Becky leaves and heads downstairs, D.J. drags the sleeping bag, with Stephanie and Mr. Bear in tow, into their room, and puts it right near the toy chest at Stephanie's bed.]