|A Little Romance|
|Season 2, episode 11|
|Air date||January 13, 1989|
|Writer(s)||Rob Dames & Bob Fraser|
|Previous||Middle Age Crazy|
When Kimmy explains Michael Montfort (Jonathan Brandis) to her best friend, D.J. finds him to be so cute, and Kimmy thought she found him to be just OK, but D.J. says that that was before she knew he liked her. Kimmy arranges for them to meet him at the bike yard after school tomorrow.
Then Stephanie bursts into the room doing the "K-I-S-S-I-N-G" rhyme, with D.J. covering her mouth at the second "S" in "K-I-S-S", Stephanie picking it up at "I-N-G", D.J. covering her mouth again at "marriage", and Stephanie picking it up at "then (comes D.J. with a baby carriage)" and completing it. She notes that the third grade does not know as they were on a field trip that day. Obviously, her sister does not want the whole school knowing about this, but it's too little too late. With the rhyme completed, all D.J. can do is plop face down on her bed, as Stephanie starts up the rhyme again.
The next day, the best friends are in the schoolyard ready for the big moment, when Michael arrives. They have a little chat and decide to sit with each other at lunch the next day, and he gives her a friendship bracelet for good measure. He later comes over to the house so D.J. can help him with his homework.
Meanwhile, Rebecca and Danny are hosting a charity event where eligible bachelors are auctioned off to women who want a date with them, so Jesse's father Nick comes over to babysit the girls. Among the participating bachelors are Danny and Joey. However, it is Jesse who ends up receiving the highest bid of them all… from a jealous Rebecca, who wins with a bid of $1,700.
Back home, in the living room, Nick, Michelle, and Stephanie are all playing a game of seven-card stud and using Hello Kitty and Flintstones-related items as money.
Over in the kitchen, as she helps him with her homework, Michael does not believe D.J. when she informs him that her dad was alive during Neil Armstrong's historic moonwalk, something Michael points out is in their history book. He soon informs her that he plans to sit with Kathy Santoni at lunch the next day. When she asks why, he explains that she is nice, fun and smart, but says that Kathy is “so pretty”. After he leaves, she takes the friendship bracelet off her wrist and tosses it aside in disgust.
That night in their room, when Stephanie asks about what happened with Michael, D.J. says she wants to be alone and gathers up her sleeping bag, pajamas and pillow, and tells her to go sleep with Michelle, as she pushes her out. When Stephanie asks if she is forgetting something (meaning a certain companion), D.J. throws Mr. Bear out.
When they come home, Jesse, Danny, and Joey hear about D.J.’s broken heart after Nick explains the situation to them. However, they make her feel worse when Danny tries to tell her the story of "The Ugly Duckling". She interprets this to mean that they think she is ugly. Luckily, Becky soon arrives. After telling the guys off about using that story, Danny asks her to try talking to D.J., who needs a woman to talk to—especially when it comes to subjects like a broken heart.
D.J. tells Becky that there's nothing to talk about, saying she's ugly, boys don't like her, and that's it. Becky remarks that that's not true because she knows D.J. to be a very pretty girl, but knows how she feels. She says that when she was in the 7th grade, she had a big crush on a boy who liked blondes, so she got a big bottle of peroxide to color her hair. Unfortunately, the peroxide turned her hair orange instead (see Quotes). She then explains that she was in a similar situation as D.J.: boyfriends come, and boyfriends go. She even mentioned that her mom made her list all her good points, and then makes D.J. do the same: She is pretty good at school, has a lot of friends, has a purple belt in karate, is nice to animals, and has great hair. She then asks if she will have another boyfriend, and Becky says that she will have lots of boyfriends. Some will break her heart and/or she will break theirs (in return). Someday when she least expects it, she will meet that special guy, and before she knows it, she will be paying $1,700 to date him, just like Becky did to Jesse tonight. Afterward, they hug, and D.J. decides that maybe another time, they should talk about girl stuff.
As they exit the room, they discover Stephanie asleep in her sleeping bag with Mr. Bear next to her near the doorway. Becky is surprised at this, but D.J. assures her that she can handle this problem on her own. As Becky heads downstairs, D.J. drags the sleeping bag—with Stephanie and Mr. Bear in tow—inside and puts it by the toy chest.
The chat works, and when Danny finds out when Becky comes downstairs to the kitchen, he thanks her for the help and then heads upstairs to say goodnight to D.J., joking that there should be a warning label on "The Ugly Duckling". After he leaves, Jesse and Becky talk about tonight's auction, and even about how they should go out more often. They share a kiss, and suddenly, Joey brings Michelle into the kitchen, and she can only blurt out "Have mercy!", to which they stare at her, Joey escorts her back out, and Jesse and Becky go back to their kiss.
Kimmy: [runs into D.J. and Stephanie's room excitedly] Stop the homework!
D.J.: But if I stop, you won't have anything to copy.
Kimmy: Well, this is more important. How do you feel about Michael Monfort?
D.J.: He's OK, I guess.
Kimmy: Well, I heard from Tom Altobello who sits next to the Epstein twins that Michael Monfort likes you.
D.J.: Are you serious? He's so cute.
Kimmy: But I thought he was just okay.
D.J.: That was before I knew he liked me. Are you sure he likes me?
Kimmy: He wants you to meet him tomorrow after school at the bike racks.
D.J.: Is this a trick?
Kimmy: If I'm lying, I will never go shopping again.
D.J.: He really does like me. [She goes into an ecstatic faint onto her bed.]
[Michael and D.J. are meeting each other for the first time, and he has a gift for her.]
Michael: You want this? It's a friendship bracelet.
D.J.: Oh, yeah, sure. Thanks. It's really neat. [She puts it on.]
[As the camera cuts to a wide shot, the whole school is witness to this moment as they emerge from the bushes.]
Kimmy: Way to go, D.J. We have a boyfriend.
Stephanie: It's about time.
[A forlorn D.J. sits on her bed, moping.]
Stephanie: [enters the bedroom] Hi, D.J. How come your boyfriend left so soon?
D.J.: I don't have a boyfriend.
Stephanie: Did he dump you?
D.J.: We broke up. Just forget it. I want to be alone. [She gathers up all of Stephanie's belongings.] Here's your sleeping bag, your pajamas, and your pillow. Go sleep with Michelle.
Stephanie: [as she is pushed out the door by D.J.] But– But– But– But– But– But– [But... D.J. has completely pushed her out and slammed the door in her face.] Aren't you forgetting something? [D.J. reopens the door and throws Mr. Bear out before slamming the door again.] How rude. [She picks him up and carries him with the rest of her stuff on the way to Michelle's room.]
[The guys' comparison of D.J. to the Ugly Duckling has caused her to lock herself in the bathroom, as Stephanie attempts to get back to her room.]
Stephanie: Oh good, my room's open. [She goes in and puts Mr. Bear down.]
Becky: [knocks on the door] D.J.? It's just Becky. Do you wanna come out so we can talk?
Stephanie: [as she goes back to Michelle's room] Forgot my stuff.
[D.J. opens the bathroom door and walks out.]
Becky: Come on, sweetheart. Let's go in your room.
[They do just that and close the door. Suddenly, Stephanie emerges from Michelle's room with the rest of her bedding, and can't believe what she sees. She knocks on the door. The door opens and D.J. throws Mr. Bear out for the second time tonight before the door is closed again.]
Stephanie: Sorry, Mr. Bear. You've had a rough night.
Becky: I got a big bottle of peroxide [to change her hair to blonde].
D.J.: Did it work?
Becky: It turned my hair orange. I looked like Howdy Doody in a miniskirt.
D.J.: Howdy who?
Goof: When Nick goes into Michelle's room to check on Michelle and Stephanie, he closes the door. But as he leaves, the door is open.
- When D.J. tries to take the bracelet off, it gets stuck to her sweater, causing her (Candace Cameron) and everyone else on-set to laugh
- When Stephanie asks why Michael left so soon, D.J. almost starts laughing
- When Stephanie goes over to sleep in Michelle's room, the door is stuck and she is unable to open it; in take two, she (Jodie Sweetin) tries again, and says, "Michelle, open the door!" while banging on it (all while trying to hold her bedding with one arm); in the third take, she does the same thing again, but then says, "I'm losing it!"