| Breaking Up is Hard to Do (in 22 Minutes) | |
| Season 3, episode 3 | |
 | |
| Air date | October 6, 1989 |
| Writer(s) | Jeff Franklin |
| Director | Bill Foster |
| Previous | Back to School Blues |
| Next | Nerd for a Day |
Breaking Up is Hard to Do (in 22 Minutes) is episode three of season three of Full House. It originally aired on October 6, 1989.
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Danny and Michelle are playing basketball with the indoor set (see #Quotes and Gallery).
Synopsis[]
After enduring a rough horseback riding excursion with Becky in which he gets bucked off his horse and thrown in the mud, a frustrated Jesse refuses to participate in any future visits to the stable, not even on a little pony. Angry that he isn't willing to take part in more things that she enjoys, Becky breaks even by skipping Jesse's music rehearsal at The Smash Club.
That leads to a heated argument between Jesse and Becky, and the argument leads to a break-up between them. Upon hearing the news of their breakup, D.J. – who has formed a strong bond with Becky – teams up with Stephanie to try to get Jesse and Becky back together.
Jesse starts dating a woman named Diane, and Jesse constantly talks about Becky on his date with Diane, because he regrets the break-up. Jesse brings Diane home with him, and Diane looks at Becky and says, "If you're not Becky, you're going to hear a lot about her." Touched by that, Becky realizes that she also regrets the break-up, so she and Jesse work things out and decide to stay together, and she even has a talk with D.J. about it before committing.
Meanwhile, Stephanie is elated when she finally loses her tooth, and "Tooth Fairy" Danny mistakenly leaves Stephanie a $20 bill under her pillow when, in the darkness of night, he thought he had pulled a $1 bill out of his wallet. In addition, Stephanie is even more elated when she tells D.J. that, with an empty milk glass and an empty plate of cookie crumbs next to her bed, she knew that her sweet tooth would pay off (see Quotes).
While D.J. is elated about that, she's more elated about jumping her first fence with Rocket; but it eventually leads to a misunderstanding: Stephanie says that Rocket jumped the fence (and not D.J.) while D.J. says that Stephanie's gums lost the tooth that fell out of her mouth (and not Stephanie herself).
Also, Danny and the guys try to teach Michelle how to share during play dates with her friends, but when that fails, it is up to the entire family to teach her about sharing (and how much fun it can be) when they have pancakes for breakfast. However, instead of taking one pancake and putting it on their plate before passing the stack to the next person, they take just one pancake from the stack – the top one, in fact – and pass the same one around to demonstrate. In order: Danny, Joey, D.J., Stephanie, Jesse, and Michelle. When it gets right back around to Michelle, she seems to finally get the knack and shares the pancake with Danny, despite the fact that it is now in pieces; so much so, he remarks that he will not even have to chew it. She also learns a valuable lesson in realizing she shouldn't be (or shouldn't have been) so greedy as she was during her play date; as the proverb suggests, she finally learns that sharing is indeed caring after all.
Quotes[]
[The opening teaser: In the living room playing with the toy basketball set...]
Danny: [in a play-by-play style similar to that of his old sportscaster gig] Tanner yo-yo's the dribble. He fakes left, he drives right, he puts Michelle in the popcorn machine and he jams it right over 2 feet, 8 inches of towering toddler! [He puts it through the basket.]
Michelle: My turn.
Danny: Okay [gives her the ball]. Here we go [puts her in position]. It's Tanner versus Tanner, for all the marbles. Michelle breaks for the basket and goes... right through my legs. Okay [picks her up]. She's going for that super-duper, high-flying, baby-skying junior, junior slama jama. Talk about serious hang time. [She dunks it.] Michelle scores! In your face.
Michelle: In your face.
Danny: 'NBA action: It's...
Michelle: Fantastic!' (see Trivia)
[In the kitchen, D.J. is wiping off the table after dinner as Stephanie enters... with a little something on her mind.]
Stephanie: D.J., I've been thinking.
D.J.: Uh-oh.
Stephanie: Santa Claus works one night a year and always gets milk and cookies. The tooth fairy works every night and all she gets is a sack full of old teeth.
D.J.: If there's a point to this, please get to it.
Stephanie: The point is I'm leaving the tooth fairy milk and cookies. Don't try to stop me, I've made up my mind. End of story. Case closed. Goodnight and good luck. [She goes upstairs with the goodies.]
D.J.: So young and yet so strange.
[As soon as those words leave her mouth, Becky comes in from the back.]
Becky: Hey, Deej.
D.J.: Hi, Becky. Do you think we can go riding next week?
Becky: Sure. Deej, you were amazing today. When did you decide to jump that fence?
D.J.: Well, when the horse was about halfway over. I figured, as long as I'm up here, I might as well go for it.
Michelle: [over the baby monitor in the kitchen] Hello? Uncle Jesse? It's me, Michelle Tanner.
Jesse: [to Becky] Somebody probably wants to hear me sing. [going upstairs] Coming, Michelle!
Becky: [to Joey] Why do you men cling to your antiquated macho attitudes?
Joey: [in a tough macho voice] Because we're tough and we're rugged! Now take a hike, toots, so I can separate my wash-and-wears from my delicates!
Jesse: [Becky overhears this through the baby monitor (see Gallery):] Michelle, now, you don't wanna grow up and be selfish like Becky. Next thing you know, you won't wanna go hear your boyfriend sing. [With her mouth open, she unclips it from the wall mount.] I don't know what's got into Becky but she's really starting to get on my nerves. [She looks at Joey.]
Joey: [looks at his arm as if there was a watch] After 7 (o'clock) already? I better check that garbage disposal [switches it on to cover up what Jesse's saying, but she quickly reaches over the counter to turn it off].
Jesse: [continues] I mean, sometimes she gets so stubborn and pigheaded.
Becky: [eyes widening upon hearing those words] Excuse me [and dashes upstairs, baby monitor in hand].
Joey: [shouting as she's gone] You know, sometimes those things [baby monitors] pick up other people's houses.
[In Michelle's bedroom...]
Jesse: Ah, Michelle, why can't Becky just realize your Uncle Jesse is right? [as Becky enters carrying the baby monitor, then standing behind him] I mean, it's so simple [hears the echo]. It's so simp-- [turns to see Becky angrily holding it up to his face] Hi! [nervous laugh] Oh, you found the baby monitor. Michelle, do that imitation of me again. [She shakes her head.]
Becky: I wanna talk to you – alone.
Jesse: Anything you can say to me, you can say in front of my niece.
Becky: No, that's not true. [They go into his room.] Stubborn?! Pigheaded?! Well, it just so happens that this stubborn pighead only goes to that club to be with you. [...] If you don't wanna do what I wanna do, why should I do what you wanna do?
Jesse: I get it-- This whole thing is about revenge. You're punishing me. You don't wanna go to my club because I don't wanna ride your stupid horses. Is that it?
Becky: It just so happens that those stupid horses are a lot smarter than you.
Jesse: Just admit it. Say that I'm right.
Becky: Okay. 'I'm right'! [using the antenna on the monitor to point to herself, and then swiftly leaves the room].
Jesse: Funny. Don't you dare walk out that door. Don't you dare leave this hallway. [She does so and quickly walks downstairs.] Don't you dare take that step, or that step, or that step! [...] [In the living room...] I just wanna tell you that... that this whole thing is your fault.
Becky: My fault? Well, I disagree. But what else is new? We always disagree. We're completely different people with completely different interests.
Jesse: Fine. Maybe we should start dating people we have more in common with.
Becky: So that's what you want.
Jesse: It's obviously what you want.
Becky: Fine, this relationship is over. [forcefully handing back the kitchen's baby monitor] Goodbye, Jesse.
Jesse: Fine. Goodbye, Rebecca.
[She walks out and is about to leave the front door, when she walks back and takes one last glance at her now ex-fiance, who opens the door for one last glance of her before slamming it shut and now realizing what he's just done.]
[In the morning, Stephanie's alarm clock goes off. Next to it are an empty milk glass and an empty plate which appears to have cookie crumbs all over it.]
Stephanie: [getting up and shutting off the alarm] All right! It's morning. I've been waiting all night for this.
D.J.: [groggily] Stephanie, it's Saturday.
Stephanie: It's also Tooth Fairy day!
D.J.: Whoop-de-do [as she rolls over in her bed].
Stephanie: [lifting up her pillow to find money under it] Whoa, baby!
D.J.: You're 'whoa, baby'-ing about a dollar bill?
Stephanie: [shows the bill to her sister, with Andrew Jackson's portrait towards her and the White House towards us] Does this look like a dollar bill?
D.J.: Twenty dollars?! WHOA, BABY!
Stephanie: I knew those milk and cookies would pay off. [She starts to go out the door...]
D.J.: You nerd-bomber, I ate the milk and cookies.
Stephanie: [stops in her tracks and gasps...] You're in trouble this Christmas. The Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus are like this [crossing her first two fingers in a "good luck" sign as she goes downstairs and her sister follows her].
[As everyone's having breakfast, Becky comes through the back door.]
Jesse: [to Joey] I knew she'd be back to apologize.
Becky: [Danny opens the door.] [enters carrying a box] Hi, everyone. Mr. Katsopolis, you left some things at my apartment. I assume you'd want your emergency blow dryer back... and your emergency styling spray.
Jesse: [holding it] Oh, no. I think you made a mistake. This must be yours. It's for "hard to manage" hair.
Becky: [takes it and pretends to read the label] Oh, no, no. This must be yours. It's for vain and pompous hair.
Stephanie: Are you guys having a fight?
Becky & Jesse: Nnnooo. [They smile and act like that wasn't a lie.]
Trivia[]
- The episode title is taken from the 1962 number-one hit song by Neil Sedaka, "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do"
- The title also contains the running time of the episode (excluding commercials)
- The opening scene ends with Danny and Michelle saying, "NBA action: It's Fantastic!", which at the time was the slogan for the NBA.
- The second episode in which Jesse and Rebecca break up (the first is in "Luck Be a Lady (Part 1)")
- Stephanie says, "Goodnight, and good luck", which was what Edward R. Murrow, famous news reporter, ended all of his radio broadcasts with (beginning during World War II)
- Jesse asks, "When's the last time you saw Mister Ed play in front of 50,000 screaming fans?" referring to the character in the sitcom of the same name about a talking horse (1961–1966)
Gallery[]
