|Season 3, episode 5|
|Air date||October 20, 1989|
|Writer(s)||Dennis Rinsler & Marc Warren|
|Previous||Nerd for a Day|
The episode begins with Michelle entering Jesse's room and saying that she climbed out of her crib all by herself, which shocks him (see Quotes). Upon hearing this news, he alerts Danny, who confirms that she is ready for her very own "big-girl bed", causing her to gasp and her mouth to drop open.
When Danny's mother Claire arrives for an extended visit, the family realizes that as a divorced woman with independent children, her recent retirement has left her feeling useless. But to celebrate her retirement after three decades in the stationary supply business, they have a gift for her: a paint set to help her pass the time. Also to help her through this difficult time, Danny convinces everyone to act as if they can't function without her. In addition, he lets her houseclean while he and the girls go to the zoo, and Jesse and Joey go to work.
Leaving a few dirty dishes in the sink and allowing Claire to pick out a new bed for Michelle may seem relatively harmless, but the little plan backfires when Claire decides that she should move in permanently. Danny has a talk with Claire, and since there is nothing keeping her in the state of Washington anymore, he decides to help her search for an apartment near the Tanner house.
During Claire's visit, Michelle's crib is replaced with a new pencil bed for her, but all she wants to do is jump up and down on the new bed. She is initially thrilled about getting out of her crib and having a brand-new "big-girl bed," but when she gets scared of being without the crib, Jesse ends up having to sleep in the room with his "little Munchkin" to get her through the first night.
Meanwhile, across the hall in their room, D.J. and Stephanie are ready to get some shut-eye themselves. While D.J. combs Stephanie's hair, they talk about when Stephanie was sleeping in a crib (long before the series began, see Quotes). Danny then comes in with the good news from above about Claire moving into an apartment near their house. They realize that even he was wrong to make them lie (or "make believe", as he called it), and that they make sure he has learned his lesson. As he leaves, they remark about the usual hatred of his spring cleaning; D.J. about having to clean the grout behind the shower, and Stephanie about asking Santa to bring her a DustBuster, and the fact she actually got one from him. The three continue to babble about the importance of spring cleaning (as the studio audience applauds and the EP credits appear).
[Opening teaser: Stephanie is reading a book on her bed when Michelle enters.]
Michelle: Stephanie, help.
Stephanie: Tie your shoes again? This is getting old. You are gonna learn to tie your shoes all by yourself, okay?
Michelle: All right.
Stephanie: Now, pay very close attention. [cut to a close-up shot] First, the rabbit crosses the stream. Like that. And then, he goes over the log and around the tree and through the hole and voila, you've got rabbit ears. Now, can you get the other one tied?
Michelle: No problem. Joey, help.
Stephanie: Kids today. They have it way too easy.
[Michelle enters Jesse's room as he's still asleep under his blanket.]
Michelle: Good morning. [He still doesn't respond, so she pulls off the covers and uses one of his catchphrases...] Look alive!
Jesse: Michelle, it's too early to be alive. What do you want?
Michelle: Grandma comes today.
Jesse: Yes, I know Grandma's comes today, thanks for the bulletin. Now get back to your crib and go back to sleep--Who let you outta your crib?
Michelle: I let me out.
Jesse: You mean, you climbed over the bars and jumped down all by yourself?
Michelle: You got it, dude [with the thumbs-up].
Jesse: Jailbreak! Danny! Michelle, come here. Come here. Now, you know how it works in this house. If you wanna get out, stay there and scream until someone lets you out. Capisce?
Michelle: No 'Capisce'. I'm a big girl.
Danny: [entering the room] It's Saturday morning.
Jesse: Don't tell me. Tell her. She climbed out of her crib all by herself.
Danny: You did? You know what this means, you little spider-baby? You are ready for your very own big-girl bed.
[Her mouth drops wide open as she gasps at this news.]
Jesse: Your very own big-girl bed. Big-girl five. [She tries high-fiving him but misses his hand.] All right!
[Then, D.J. enters and announces that...]
D.J.: Grandma's cab just pulled up.
Danny: Grandma's here early! Let's go! [Everyone heads downstairs just as the doorbell rings.]
Claire: Now that I'm divorced and my kids have grown up and I'm retired, my life went from "get up and go" to "why get up".
[In Michelle's bedroom, Danny and Jesse are getting her ready for her first night in the new bed by putting the pillows on.]
Jesse: Okay, Michelle, there we go. Lean back. There.
Danny: Why don't you just bubble-pack her?
Jesse: Danny, I'm sorry, but she's little and she's round. And she rolls easy. I say we build kind of a fence thing around here.
Danny: You mean, like a crib?
Jesse: We had one of those already, didn't we? [He takes the extra pillows off.] We'll put them on the floor, just in case.
[In D.J. and Stephanie's room, they sit on Stephanie's bed as D.J. combs her roommate's hair.]
Stephanie: D.J., do you remember when I was sleeping in a crib?
D.J.: Yeah. Life was so easy when you were behind bars.
- The first appearance of Michelle's pencil bed
- The first episode where the closing credits end with the cookout scene, with Michelle being given a hot dog and a kiss from Jesse, and then carried over to the table by Danny (from the opening)
- The second and last episode where Jesse's "Look alive!" catchphrase is used against him (the other being "Goodbye Mr. Bear" [2.18], where Danny wakes Jesse from his pre-spring-cleaning nap)