|Honey, I Broke the House|
|Season 3, episode 20|
|Air date||March 9, 1990|
|Previous||Those Better Not Be the Days|
|Next||Just Say No Way|
Joey and Michelle are playing T-ball (or tee-ball, depending on use). She whacks the ball, runs towards first, skipping over second and going to third, then goes back to first, steals second, then third, and goes home. She remarks, "This game is way too easy".
Jesse wants to have a romantic night with Becky, who tells Jesse that she can't because she is scheduled for a business dinner with Beau McIntyre, a former football player who is scheduled to be a guest on Wake Up, San Francisco, and that makes Jesse jealous.
Joey is preoccupied with his new car "Rosie", a 1963 rambler. When he sees a nick in Rosie's paint, he leaves with Comet to go to Sid & Jean's Auto Supplies to buy a bottle of touch-up paint. While Joey is gone, Stephanie gets inside the car so she will have something to do.
As she is sitting in the driver's seat, she decides to turn the radio on; it does not come on, so she turns the key, hoping that she is turning it toward the auxiliary option that allows you to turn on the radio while the car is not running. Instead, she ends up starting the car. Not knowing what the letters and numbers on the gear lever mean (park, reverse, etc.), and forgetting about the radio dials she was turning earlier, she thinks that the letter "R" means radio, so she puts it on R, only to learn the hard way that R means reverse, as Rosie backs up and crashes into the kitchen (eliciting an "OH!" from the audience when the dust settles from all the damage); so much so, it takes out the window, curtains and rod, and even topples the table and chairs. She is so terrified and feels so bad about it that she has her ride to dance class drop her off at Becky's house on the way home, and Stephanie tells Becky that she can never go back home. When Michelle sees this, she alerts D.J. and Kimmy, who are studying upstairs in D.J. and Stephanie's room, about the obvious: "There's a car in the kitchen", to which D.J. sarcastically adds, "And there's a bus in the bathroom." The two classmates head downstairs and can only muster out a "WHOA BABY!" when they see the mess, and D.J. then says the same the exact same quote that Michelle said, and Michelle adds in, "I told you so." D.J. then asks Michelle how Joey's car came in to the kitchen, to which Michelle replies, "Through the window." The guys come home and see this, and when Joey sees what has happened, all he can exclaim is "MY CAR!".
Jesse shows up at Becky's house to apologize for being jealous. In the process, he also talks to Stephanie, who is afraid Danny will stop loving her when he sees what she has done. Back at home, Danny proves her wrong, because although he was indeed angry about the mess, he forgives her, and (as inspirational music plays) he promises that there is nothing she could ever do that would make him stop loving her. However, she is still angry over what she did that she literally hides under the blankets of her bed, telling Danny that she does not deserve fresh air. He asks her how long she intends to stay under there, to which she replies, "'Til I get married!", and he remarks, "You know, it could be very difficult to meet somebody under there."
D.J. also talks to her, and, like Danny and Jesse before her, reminds Stephanie that she needs to learn from her mistakes and not always mope around all the time. Danny reminds her that there's always the chance of rebuilding a new wall, and even buying a new car, but there is only one Stephanie Judith Tanner that can never, ever be replaced. After their talk, they hug (as the somber music plays out and the EP credits appear).
Michelle: There's a car in the kitchen!
D.J. & Kimmy: WHOA BABY!!
D.J.: There's a car in the kitchen!
Michelle: I told you so.
D.J.: Michelle, do you know how Joey's car got in here?
Michelle: Yes I do.
Michelle: Through the window.
Danny: Joey, are you all right? You had us worried sick!
Joey: Danny, I'm fine.
Danny: In that case, you're in big trouble, mister!
Stephanie: I dro--- I dro--- I dro---
Rebecca: You dropped something? Did something break? What did you break?
Stephanie: You name it, I broke it.
Stephanie: I’m going to start a new life as a Mexican hat dancer.
Rebecca: [after hearing that Stephanie backed Joey’s car into the kitchen] No wonder you're moving to Mexico.
[Joey enters the kitchen, just as D.J. takes a picture.]
Joey: MY CAR! Rosie! This is my punishment for not filling the ice cube tray?
Danny: Are you saying you didn't know about this?
Joey: If I did, don't you think I would've bought a bigger jar of touch-up paint?
Michelle: [while Joey leans on his crashed car, sobbing] Don't cry. Be a big boy.