|I'm There for You, Babe|
|Season 2, episode 20|
|Air date||April 14, 1989|
|Previous||Blast From the Past|
|Next||Luck Be a Lady (Part 1)|
In D.J. and Stephanie's bedroom, Stephanie is sitting on her toy chest, playing a game. Michelle comes in and says that she wants Stephanie to play "horsey" with her. Unfortunately, Stephanie is too busy playing her game. But surprise, surprise, it's Michelle who inherits the old crying routine that Stephanie used last season. It works, and Stephanie takes Michelle downstairs with her to play "horsey".
It is Jesse's 26th birthday, and it seems that everyone is trying to pull him in every direction at the same time. But before the stressful day can begin, they start by singing "Birthday" by the Beatles to him upon surprising him.
Jesse is scheduled to coach D.J. and Kimmy's soccer team in a game at 3:30 pm, he and Joey are doing a jingle for a credit dentist commercial, Danny schedules Jesse to perform at the Smash Club in front of San Francisco Mirror music critic Sam Battersby, Stephanie needs him to bake 100 of his special cookies for a school bake sale, and Michelle needs him to fix her jack-in-the-box toy.
While Stephanie is in the kitchen preparing her bake sale cookie dough as Mr. Bear "looks on" (and suggesting that she lick the bowl because, in her words, he's "put on a couple of pounds"), Jesse coaches the soccer team to a win (see both Quotes and Trivia below), then Becky shows up at the house and asks Jesse to go with her to the wedding of her aunt's former son-in-law tomorrow, and then Danny asks him to fix his car.
Jesse thinks he can handle it all, until he and the family go to the Smash Club, and he discovers that the Rippers did not show up because, in the confusion caused by working himself to a frazzle trying to do everything at the same time, Jesse ended up booking them for another gig on the same night – at the Holiday Inn in Sacramento.
Feeling that they have been taking advantage of Jesse's generosity of late, the Tanner family tries to bail him out of his double-headed dilemma. Jesse is forced to use the family as his makeshift bandmates because he has always wanted to perform in front of Sam Battersby. They, along with Becky and Kimmy, perform Do-Wah Diddy Diddy. Needless to say, it is a disaster; their performance, with each verse, causes many patrons to get up and leave. Jesse realizes that all of the things he has obligated himself to on this day are too much, and the family agrees, deciding to give Jesse a much needed break from it all. However, he takes care of one of the things on his list, and that is helping Michelle fix her jack-in-the-box.
[In the teaser, we are in D.J. & Stephanie's bedroom, as Stephanie is sitting on her toy chest playing a game. Michelle comes in.]
Stephanie: Can I help you?
Michelle: Stefie play horsey.
Stephanie: Stefie's very busy. Stefie doesn't wanna play horsey.
Michelle: Yes she does.
Stephanie: No she doesn't.
Michelle: Yes she does.
Stephanie: No she doesn't.
Michelle: [taking the cue of Stephanie's "crying routine"] Yes she does.
Stephanie: Okay, let's play horsey.
Stephanie: How could I fall for the old crying routine? I invented it.
Jesse: [repeated line] I'm there for you, babe.
Stephanie: We have to go to school on Uncle Jesse's birthday?
Danny: Oh, don't worry, honey. I'm sure they'll have some assembly program in his honor.
Danny" [to Jesse & Joey] Guys, I've got some news. Jess, you get out your new appointment book. Write down: "7:30 tonight, Sam Battersby, Smash Club".
Jesse: Sam Battersby? The music critic from the "San Francisco Mirror"? That Sam Battersby?
Danny: Yep. He was on the show today and I talked him into coming to hear your band tonight.
Jesse: Danny, I've been trying to get this guy forever. How did you do it?
Danny: I just used my wit, my charm and my two Giants tickets.
[Downstairs in the living room, D.J. and Kimmy are doing a few practice kicks for their big game. D.J. manages to kick the ball, but Kimmy stops it with her foot.]
Kimmy: Ha! You'll never get the ball past me.
[She kicks the ball towards D.J., who stops it with her foot.]
D.J.: Hey, Kimmy, look! Jeans on sale!
Kimmy: Where? [And when she does look, D.J. tries another kick, and it goes sailing to Kimmy's left. Needless to say, Kimmy's not pleased with this "joke".]
D.J.: Yes! Tanner scores a goal!
Kimmy: Don't ever make jokes about a sale. That's so cruel.
Jesse: [rushing out to the living room] Alright. Come on, girls! Let's go, go, go! We got a tough game today. Let's go! Come on! Come on!
[Suddenly at the door is none other than...]
Stephanie: Uncle Jesse, Uncle Jesse!
Jesse: Stephanie, Stephanie!
Stephanie: Tomorrow's my school bake sale. Will you bake 100 of your special cookies? Please, please, pretty please? With chocolate chips on top?
Jesse: [mimicking, not mocking, Stephanie] "With chocolate chips on top?" How could I turn it down?
Stephanie: You really can't. Let's go!
D.J: [to Stephanie, as she grabs Jesse and pulls him away from her younger sister] He'll bake your cookies later, you little chicken wing.
Stephanie: Oh, yeah? Well, if I'm a chicken wing, then you're a can of chicken noodle soup!
D.J.: You have the brains of a paramecium.
Stephanie: Maybe I have the brains of a paramecium, but you only have the brains of one mecium! Ha, ha, ha! [goes into the kitchen]
D.J.: [to Jesse] There really is no way to beat her, is there?
Jesse: No, not really. Let's go, girls! Come on! Look alive now! Here we go! [All 3 of them are out the door in a flash.]
[Later in the kitchen, Stephanie is preparing the dough for her bake sale cookies, as Mr. Bear "looks on".]
Stephanie: Mr. Bear, while Uncle Jesse's baking cookies for the bake sale, you'd better let me lick the bowl. You've put on a couple of pounds.
[Then suddenly, from the back door, we hear...]
Jesse, D.J. and Kimmy: [singing] Na na na na, hey hey, goodbye! Yeah! Whoo! [they all slap high-fives over their latest victory]
D.J.: We creamed those nerd-bombers.
Danny: Jess, you promised to help me with my car.
Joey: And my jingle.
D.J.: And my soccer.
Stephanie: And my cookies.
Michelle: And Jack.
Jesse: No problem. We'll just tow the car down to the soccer field, and while I'm fixing the car, I'll crank up the rear-view-mirror, so I can see the field and I'll coach the game, and during half time I'll run over to the school cafeteria and bake those cookies, and while I'm there, I'll get that Jack out of the box, and Joseph, don't worry about that jingle because I'll be whistling. I'll whistle while I work, people, this is your Uncle J. I may take a split-second timing, but I can make this work.
Jesse: [seeing that the family has decided to give him a day off] But what about all those things I promised to do for you guys?
Joey: All taken care of. I got us more time to work on the jingle.
Becky: And my cousin Sharon will keep me company at the wedding.
Stephanie: Daddy's baking my cookies.
D.J.: Joey's coaching soccer.
Danny: And Mr. Goodwrench is fixing my car.
- When Jesse tells the family that he will take care of all their problems by saying, "I'll whistle while I work", it is a reference to the song, "Whistle While You Work", from Disney's "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs"
- The song that Jesse, Kimmy, and D.J. sing when they return from their soccer game is Steam's "Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye" (1969 – covered by Bananarama in 1983); a song typically sung at the end of a game to the losing team