|Season 2, episode 5|
|Air date||November 11, 1988|
|Writer(s)||Marc Warren & Dennis Rinsler|
|Previous||D.J.'s Very First Horse|
|Next||Beach Boy Bingo|
D.J. is in her room, with Michelle, looking at a picture of Patrick Swayze in a magazine. D.J. asks Michelle if he is cute. Michelle's mouth drops wide open, at which point D.J. blows a bubble with her bubble gum, and Michelle pops it – finding it funny, but D.J. does not find that funny (see Quotes).
Jesse is having problems with an advertising jingle that he has been hired to write for Fred's Tire Town. When Joey gives him the inspiration he needs in order to write it, the result is that it is bought. That bit of success leads to Jesse making an offer to Joey – he wants him to be his writing partner. Joey accepts the offer, but under one condition: if they want to add a little humor, they have to do it in his room, as it is the "comedy" room and Jesse's is the "music" room.
With the success of the Fred's Tire Town jingle, they decide to do one for Kitty Krispies cat food. But Jesse wants that jingle to be more than just funny – it has to be catchy as well. In other words, he and Joey can do a duet, similar to a guy singing with his cat (Jesse will be the guy and Joey will be the cat), and Joey can sing in a cat voice. Unfortunately, he can't wear a cat suit – not even just ears and a tail; and no other cat-related props, not even a six-foot ball of yarn. But when he gives the jingle "the Joey treatment," and the jingle is not bought, a feud erupts between them – especially when Joey tells Jesse that he did not wear a cat suit, but Jesse said that he did have a cat suit – on his hand (in addition, he also had 3 cat puppets that popped up out of his briefcase), but they work things out and decide to remain partners.
As a reminder, "rule #1" is to never touch D.J.'s stuff, and Stephanie is always breaking this rule by messing up D.J.'s things. And the only way to do that is to break "rule #2", and that is to never set foot on D.J.'s side of the room.
For example, D.J., having returned from karate practice, catches Stephanie and Harry playing on her side of the room and even on her bed, while they were faking sickness from having a pretend tea party with Stephanie's tea party set as they played "house" (a "rule #2" violation on both counts, and a "rule #1" violation of messing up her bed, as messing up anything of hers is considered "touching" her stuff). She gets them up off her bed, threatens to do a chop on them as she is pumped, and reminds them to leave her stuff alone. Stephanie just scoffs that D.J.'s jealous of her because she has a boyfriend and D.J. does not (eliciting an "OH!" from the studio audience), saying that Harry is a "boy" and he is her "friend", to which D.J. says that she is dreaming about her "boyfriend"; to Stephanie, however, that dream is reality. As they continue their tea party, D.J. remarks that she is never having kids.
Elsewhere, Danny takes on the daunting task of toilet-training Michelle. When he returns home, Joey informs Danny that "Madame Curie" is taking a nap after licking squash off her high chair. In any event, Danny shows off a state-of-the-art, latest high-tech, all-digital Japanese potty. Joey remarks that it's all happening so fast. They both remark that soon, after being potty-trained, Michelle will be heading off to school, meeting boys, going to the prom, and getting married. When Danny actually does potty-train her, he shows off a Potty Polly doll and uses it to demonstrate.
Later, D.J. catches Stephanie and Harry again...this time, both eating orange ice cream bars that were reserved for her and Kimmy...and the kicker: their names were written on the wrappers. Stephanie tries to give D.J. back the ice cream bar she was eating, expecting her to finish it; however, D.J. obviously knows the damage has already been done and obviously is not going to finish an already-eaten ice cream bar, despite the fact that the wrapper has her and her best friend's names. She already warned Stephanie, but now she is ready to revoke Stephanie's "Get Out of Jail Free card" and make her pay the ultimate price for her actions.
D.J. is out to teach Stephanie a lesson about not following the rules, and warns her that she won't know when it's coming or how it's coming, but what she will know is that it's coming. Since Stephanie's always messing with D.J.'s stuff, D.J. decides to return the favor, starting with tying all of Stephanie's shoes together by the laces while she is not wearing them, and that Stephanie is to untie those shoes starting with the little white sneaker at the bottom and working her way up to the top. This coincides with Joey and Jesse's feud when both come back from their jingle session. Like the guys, the girls also "kiss and make up", learning the important rule of "Never walk away angry".
Speaking of the guys' feud, Jesse is, of course, angry at Joey for taking the comedy treatment of the "Kitty Krispies" jingle way too far. This makes Jesse say that maybe there are too many dads in the house, reminding him of the show My Two Dads, and maybe all they need are two dads instead of three. They're both "fine" with that, as they head to their rooms, but they have trouble opening the childproof gates, so they climb over them.
D.J. and Stephanie have a plan to get the two of them working together again, as D.J. gets Jesse and asks Stephanie to get Joey. Stephanie says her sister has a great mind – if only she could use it for good (such as helping Stephanie untie her shoes).
Jesse is already in the girls' room assuring Stephanie that there are no monsters in the closet and he'll check for her, and Joey enters assuring D.J. that she didn't break a window and that he'll check for her. When Stephanie notices Joey's in the room Jesse decides to leave, and so does Joey. But the girls block their exit and, like Danny did earlier with the girls, makes them apologize.
At that point, Danny comes in and surprises everyone with the big news. As soon as the bathroom bell rings, he brings Michelle out and everyone is happy to hear that she's successfully and properly been potty-trained.
However, before they can celebrate the big news, Joey, Jesse, D.J., and Stephanie all feel that they need a moment in the girls' room, so they all go back in and sit down at the little table. The guys remind the girls that nobody is leaving the house, and sometimes in the heat of the moment, they say things they do not really mean. D.J. and Stephanie are sisters and they fight all the time, and Joey and Jesse are like brothers and they fight all the time. Joey asks if Jesse really thinks of him as a brother, but Jesse says Joey irritates him like one. Joey says that is the nicest thing he has ever said to him, and Jesse says they raise the kids together, do the laundry together, and make school lunches together. Somewhere along the line, they became brothers...or housewives.
Joey apologizes (as the inspirational music plays) for springing the puppets on him during the "Kitty Krispies" jingle, as he thought it would be a big hit and he was trying to surprise Jesse and he realizes that he should have talked to Jesse about it first. Jesse apologizes for going crazy about it, and when Joey points out that something was bothering him, that "something" was that he is afraid that he will not make it as a musician, just like Joey is afraid that he will not make it as a comedian. Jesse points out that it is hard leaving the family business as an exterminator, and Joey points out that he goes through that fear every time he goes onstage attempting to make people laugh. But he says that Jesse has to hang tough, and that he has real talent. If it makes it any easier for him, the rest of the family has faith in him. Stephanie says that the "Fred's Tire Town" jingle is her favorite song (as she listened to it at the start), and D.J. says that they could sing it at their graduations – after she asks. Jesse thanks everyone and says it makes him feel better (as the music stops).
Jesse admits to Joey that they had a few problems in the beginning, but they make a pretty good team, and Joey agrees that they did some good stuff. They commit to remaining partners (like Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, The Rat Pack's Dean Martin and Sammy Davis, Jr., and even Bert and Ernie), but no puppets anymore. They hug (as the audience gives an "aw" and applauds). Stephanie decides this calls for a tea party, and they all give a little toast to their friendship. She exclaims, "This tea is poison!" and they all fake sickness, just like earlier (as the audience applauds and the EP credits appear).
[See also Opening Teaser.]
[D.J. blows a bubble with her bubble gum. Michelle pops the bubble...]
D.J.: [about Michelle popping her bubble gum] Not funny.
Michelle: [after feeling her hand] Yuck.
The episode title is a take on the song "Jingle Bells".
An outtake from the episode shows John Stamos saying "Haven't you seen that show 'My Three Dads'? (instead of My Two Dads), then Dave Coulier says, "Yeah, it's called Full House, you dip---!" (which brings laughter from the set and audience).