|Season 1, episode 10|
|Air date||December 4, 1987|
|Previous||The Miracle of Thanksgiving|
|Next||The Big Three-O|
Joey is in the kitchen ironing everyone's clothes while humming the tune to 2001: A Space Odyssey. As soon as everyone else gets home, he gives them the good news about being one of many comedians to take part on a 2-week, 16-campus college tour. Everyone is excited about this, except Joey himself. He is afraid that if he takes the gig, he will not be able to take care of the girls during those two weeks, so Jesse volunteers to take his place so he can get away from his parents' exterminator business for awhile. Everyone else agrees with the decision, and Joey decides to go ahead and press his luck as suggested.
In the meantime, Joey has always been a good sport about living in a tiny alcove in the living room, but when it is time to work on his comedy routine, the toughest part is finding a quiet spot to practice.
He starts in the living room, but Stephanie has to rehearse for her upcoming Honeybee troop meeting (as she runs around the room while playing "Flight of the Bumblebee" on her little boombox, appropriately). Second, he tries the hallway, but Jesse is playing his music and D.J. has to do her homework, so she asks her uncle to stop. Third, he tries Michelle's room, but in her crib is an annoying toy parrot that records every human's voice.
When he finally does find a spot, that being the garage, it does not help. As quiet as it can be, it is also cold, and turning on his VW Beetle's/Bug's heater to warm up both himself and the garage will just waste the battery. And while he may use the car as his closet, and the wipers to dry off the windshield after his "water fountain" routine (which elicits applause from the studio audience), no one is there to see it... except D.J. She suggests that after she finishes her homework, he can rehearse in her room, but not spit on her bed. He tells her that the worst part about practicing anywhere is that he has no privacy, and she mentions that in her pre-Stephanie days, her Bananarama poster did not have to be shared with Stephanie's Rainbow Brite poster as it is now, mentioning that she has to put up with living with "a 5-year-old who thinks I was born so she would have someone to play with". Joey mentions in his pre-alcove days, he lived "like a king", with his own door, four walls, and a light switch. D.J. offers him her bike basket in case he needs a place to hang (and air dry) his socks, but he decides to keep them in the glove compartment. He asks her to go get him another glass of water so he can use his "water fountain" routine to clean the car, and she does so.
Despite these issues, Joey's high spirits are never in short supply, but when the family seems to barely notice his absence when he goes away for the weekend, he begins to wonder if anyone even wants him around anymore. Could there perhaps be an even bigger reason behind the family's recently standoffish behavior?
Meanwhile, while everyone else is inside the house, Stephanie learns the meaning of a "lookout", and even how it works. Danny explains that it is to inform the rest of the family as to when Joey is coming, not when he's not coming – and Stephanie even realizes there's a secret code to all of this.
In the meantime, everyone is gathered in Michelle's room, where D.J. explains the entire situation to everyone about Joey doing his "water fountain" routine in an empty garage, and everyone feels just as empty about it as he does. Danny agrees that is indeed sad, and Jesse says that they could have been there to watch it. D.J. says the obvious: Joey has no place to rehearse without disturbing anyone and they have to make time to watch him. And everyone agrees that it is about time that Joey got his own room. D.J.'s plan A is that she moves into Michelle's room, Joey moves into what is currently D.J. and Stephanie's room, Michelle moves into the alcove, and Stephanie gets a tent in the backyard. That immediately is shot down by Stephanie. So D.J. goes to plan B, and a simple one at best: put bunk beds in Jesse's room, and both he and Joey can be roommates. However, Jesse shoots that one down as well.
The next morning, before Joey departs for his two-week comic tour, he shows Jesse a bulletin board with color-coded Post-It notes for the various weekday activities: The girls' after-school activities are in blue, cleaning days are in pink, and D.J.'s dental appointment is in green (see Trivia). Danny, D.J., and Stephanie all come down and join Jesse and Joey for a nice breakfast of eggs, bacon, toast, milk, and orange juice, all prepared by Jesse, who also gives Danny the morning paper with the sports section on top. Danny remarks, "It looks like Jesse, it sounds like Jesse, I think I'll keep him." They quickly eat, and Danny then leaves for work, and after Jesse gives them their lunches, the girls leave for school.
Later that day, after the girls come home from school, they express their feelings about missing Joey, and of course, Jesse misses him too. They also notice that Danny hasn't come home from work yet, so they decide to start eating without him, D.J. suggesting they start with some veggies.
When Danny does comes home from work, he's a whopping 25 minutes late from covering a Golden State Warriors practice session in Oakland. He greets everyone, and the girls greet him. All Jesse can say is "Give me a break." All Danny can say is "Huh?" Jesse replies, "Don't 'Huh?' me." He complains to Danny that even though he did a good job at cleaning the house, washing and ironing everyone's clothes, taking Joey's place to babysit the children of three moms (see Trivia), missing Oprah, running Stephanie to her ballet lesson and D.J. to the dentist (with no cavities), and slaved over a hot stove cooking chicken tetrazzini for everyone's dinner (so Danny could have a hot meal when he comes home); said dinner dries up and turns cold, and he blames Danny for it; though of course, Danny blames the usual rush-hour traffic for the delay and apologizes to Jesse, but Jesse does not accept the apology one bit. He says that if Danny was going to be late, he should have called. However, regardless of the delay, it seems everyone likes the food, and Stephanie says that it is just a little dry as she gives her uncle a kiss (which elicits an "aw" from the audience). Danny explains to Jesse that his first day as a "housewife" is the toughest and he will help him get through it. He also explains that he called some contractors and they will be at the house for the next two weeks to make Joey's new room. While that may be another room to clean, at least it is a room with more space.
When Joey does come home from his two weeks away, the house is as quiet as a mouse. Putting down his bags in the alcove, as usual, he is surprised to see that it's completely empty, causing him to wonder where his things are. He also wonders where everyone else is. But not to worry, as the rest of the family is in the kitchen playing Monopoly (with Jesse as banker/auctioneer), and they reveal to Joey that they made him a room. They moved all of Joey's stuff into what was the garage and is now the basement, his mom Mindy provided the old furniture, whatever junk that was there is now in the attic, Jesse's motorcycle is parked in the backyard, and Danny's car is parked on the street in front of the house. Joey, still unable to come to terms that where his bedroom is now was where the garage was then, thinks it must've cost a fortune for Danny to renovate it. However, Danny (as the inspirational music plays) reminds Joey that he's his best friend, and he did Danny the best and biggest favor of his life by helping him raise the girls. Joey, still in awe over his new room, remarks that no one has ever done anything like this for him before, and the best part is, great as the new room is, the greater thing is that the family wants him here. Danny asks Joey if he is kidding, but they are not kidding that he's a part of the family. Jesse welcomes Joey home and puts him on the day shift. D.J. says that Stephanie can sleep in the alcove, but Stephanie offers it to D.J. Joey then realizes that they were kidding when Danny wanted to forward Joey's mail to the gutter and Jesse wanted to fling Joey's belongings to the front lawn and have the trash/recycling people pick it up. The whole family runs over and tackles Joey on his new bed (as the audience applauds and the EP credits appear).
- Dustin Autumn as Dustin (only acting credit)
- Benji Schwimmer as Benji (acting debut)
- Robert Lucas as Robbie (only acting credit)
- Ryan Christopher as Ryan (only acting credit)
- Janice Sweetin as Janice (adopted mother of Jodie Sweetin; only acting credit)
- Barbara Cameron as Barbara (mother of Candace Cameron Bure)
- Joan Leizman as Joanie
[In Michelle's room...]
Stephanie: Joey's not here yet.
Danny: Time-out, Stephanie. Honey, let's have a little talk about this "lookout" thing. The key is to let us know when Joey is coming, not when Joey is not coming.
Stephanie: This is harder than I thought.
Danny: No, sweetie, it's easy. All you have to do is, when you see Joey coming, you give us the secret code. The duck flies at midnight.
Stephanie: “The duck flies at midnight.” I should get paid for this.
D.J.: Okay, I got this all figured out. Now, if I move into Michelle's room, Joey moves into my room, Michelle moves into the alcove, and Stephanie gets a tent in the backyard.
Stephanie: I don't think so.
D.J.: Okay, plan B. If we put bunk beds in Jesse's room...that means Uncle Jesse and Joey could be roommates. Great idea, huh?
Jesse: I don't think so.
Joey: Oh, here you are.
Stephanie: The duck, the turtle, the chicken drives to 7-Eleven at midnight.
TV: We'll be right back with Judge Wapner's decision after this.
Jesse: Hang that dry cleaner, Judge Wapner. Hang him!
- Two of the mothers who dropped off their children with Joey, Barbara, and Janice, were played by Candace Cameron and Jodie Sweetin's real-life mothers; however, they are credited by their first names as opposed to playing themselves
- Here, Joey gets his own place in the basement, but in the next episode, "The Big Three-O", the garage is the same as before this episode, because the next episode was supposed to air before this one and got pre-empted
- D.J. makes an attempt to get her own room in this episode, by suggesting that Michelle sleeps in the alcove and Stephanie sleeps in a tent in the backyard or that Jesse and Joey get bunk beds and share a room; however, she fails in the process
- From this episode until "Fuller House" (season 4 episode), the garage is Joey's bedroom and becomes the basement
- June Cleaver, mentioned by Jesse in his speech as a "housewife", is "Beaver's" mother on Leave it to Beaver
- When Jesse says "Hang that dry cleaner, Judge Wapner, hang 'em!", he's watching an episode of The People's Court in the living room, and referring to Joseph Wapner (1919–2017), the judge from the original run of the series (1981–1993)
- Goof: When Joey is explaining the board to Jesse and what all the colored Post-Its mean, he says the green one is D.J.'s dentist appointment, but if you look at the board there are multiple green Post-Its